GTime Johnny

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gTime Johnny
He is no slave of a technological generated fantasy.
He is no slave of a technological generated fantasy.
Personal Details
Profession

gTimer of the Tech Age

Religion

gTime

Ideology

gTime

Age

53

Birth place

California

Spouse

Nature

Residence

The Outskirts of San Francisco

Status

Breaking free from recorded history

Social Networking
Youtube channel

Johnny Merrill

Website

Object Oriented Life

Facebook

Johnny Merrill

Twitter

gTime Johnny Merrill

Physical attributes
Eye colour

Brown

Hair colour

Grey

Drunken Peasants were the most evolved on the Internet. They found me!

— gTime Johnny
gTime Johnny (real name: Johnny Merrill) is a YouTuber, artist, inventor and natural law philosopher who lives in the wilderness of Northern California with a family of critters. He spends his days espousing a unique worldview that only the enlightened few fully understand. PaulsEgo is a gTimer and considers Johnny to be an arousal of humanity.[1]

Description

In his videos, Johnny regularly advocates "rising above recorded language" and in favor of "thinking with objects".[2] His origin is a hotly debated topic among scientists and historians, many believe him to be a forest spirit dissatisfied with humanity's new founded dependence on technology, civilization, and history, and wishes to return humanity to its natural roots. Others believe him to be an aged Bill Hicks, from an alternate reality where his comedy elevated to a point where all world wars stopped and humanity embraced itself as part of the universe.

Johnny's revolutionary ideas have been shown numerous times on the Drunken Peasants and is easily the coolest dude that has ever been on the show. He takes good care of his animals, which pisses off people who want to rape and murder animals. He also may be the greatest man of our era. gTime Johnny's role model is a man named Alan Kay. gTime Johnny admires him for his pioneering work on object-oriented programming.

gTime Johnny also has his own website System Design Literacy. Here you'll find all sorts of helpful information about Identity, Behavior, and State.

On Drunken Peasants

Johnny made his Drunken Peasants debut at the beginning of Episode 88 with a video entitled "I'm gTime Johnny An Arousal Of Humanity." During Episode 102, each of the Drunken Peasants began to understand what gTime and Catholic Time really are. [3]

gTime Johnny's videos were featured in all three episodes of the Drunken Peasants during the third full week of April 2015. This includes Episodes 108, 109, and 110. On Episode 110, Johnny thanked the Drunken Peasants for fighting Catholic Time Terrorists. Sargon of Akkad claimed that Johnny might be a modern prophet, but has his doubts because of the fact that Johnny makes videos without wearing pants.

Johnny appeared as a guest on episode 116 of Drunken Peasants, where he finally converted everyone on the podcast to his philosophy. Paul was a little skeptical, but ended up being convinced as well.

300th Special

He made his second guest appearance on episode 200, where he debated and brutally annihilated Jean-François Gariépy on the philosophy of gTime. Johnny revealed he has never had sex with his horse, but joked that he's considered it from living out in the middle of nowhere for so long. He believes that our language needs to be reformed, as it originates from a period in which the Earth was flat. After some confusion and Johnny's connection going out, Paul explained took up the baton in explaining gTime to everyone on the podcast in a simplistic and understandable way. He later returned to explain more of his philosophy from his own, more unique perspective while confirming that Paul had the right idea.

One with Paul

During episode 291, all the peasants watched one his videos while high on acid in hopes that they would finally understand what he was saying. The Ben, Scotty, and TJ were still pretty stumped but learned a bit more about philosophy. However, Paul was able to connect with him on a deep spiritual level, where he actually realized that he and Johnny are actually the same person.

George Carlin Theory

Some fans of the show theorize that gTime Johnny is actually George Carlin. According to this theory, George Carlin did not die in 2008, but rather faked his death, changed his name to Johnny Merrill, and left civilization to live in the wilderness. After years of isolation, his insanity grew and he now assumes the persona of the 'Hippy-Dippy Weather Man'.

Quotes

It's time for word masturbation! Verbal ejaculation: Begin! God! God! God! Allah! Allah! Allah! Oh, Jesus! Jesus! Oh, I'm a Christian! Oh, I'm a Muslim! I'm a word ejaculator! Hoo, hoo, hoo! Wait: there's a whole 'nother bunch of religions. OH! AMERICA! RUSSIA! CHINA! Oooh, oooh, ooh, I'm Chinese, I'm American, I'm Russian. I'm Muslim. Oh my gosh. Oh, oh oh, OH OH OH OH. Oh, verbal ejaculation. Oh, word masturbation! OOOOOOOOOH! I LOVE YOU FRIENDS! OOOOOOOOH!

— Teaching you how to masturbate like a word slave.

Trust yourselves, don't care about humans of the past. You are the one thinking, and you think with objects from earth time and man time based on inheritance. You don't need language to think, and we all become global citizens.

— Speaking his honest words.

Computer programmers already think like wild animals.

— Johnny throws some shade.

I used to be a four-legger but then when the big rift happened I picked up a stick.

— The origin of gTime Johnny.

Children are more evolved than us.

— Johnny takes on mankind.

There's a dichotomy. The heart, the mind, every cell in me in catastrophe. We gotta be real, man.

— Telling it like it is.

I don't rescue St. Bernards. They rescue me.

— Johnny being deep.

Atheist could not change a light bulb, because they would blow up.

— Woah.

I was raised by dogs.

— Explaining his childhood; a real-life Tarzan.

I'm the most evolved man on Earth.

— Being entirely.

...and Tesla was like, 'Cool, way, rock on!

— Being an information well of history.

... I love you guys, buh bye!!!

— Why we love him.

Trivia

  • Prior to his current lifestyle, he claims he was a professional skier.[4]
  • Johnny was once married for several years, until The Vigilant Christian Mario's muscular build convinced his ex-wife to sleep with him instead of Johnny. She later dumped Mario when she found out he was a faggot.
  • Johnny is not mentally ill in any way and totally has everything figured out.
  • He lives in the mountain wilderness in rural California the hearts and minds of everyone and everything and every cell.
  • His crazy ramblings make an awesome Techno Song.
  • TJ finds Gail's kookiness more coherent.
  • He has one amazing beard.
  • As we speak, he is fucking his horse saving the world from word slavery.
  • He appeared on a livestream with Evan Lefavor and Patrick Coleman in which he stated that he does indeed smoke pan. [1]
  • He sometimes uses white boards to translate his ideas.
  • He voted for Trump in the 2016 general election.

Images Gallery

Videos Gallery

Me and Jenny becoming one
gTimers of the TechAge Innovators
How To Word-Masturbate....
Alphabet Soup

Appearances

References

  1. https://youtu.be/aUp2LR9-PPI?t=55m
  2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cD2yW6pGS5E
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABk1qbLvsvk
  4. https://youtu.be/aUp2LR9-PPI?t=1h6m