Free Press Media

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Free Press Media
After getting dumped by Anita.
After getting dumped by Anita.
Personal Details
Profession

YouTuber

Religion

Christian (Might be Calvinist)

Residence

Austin, Texas

Status

Thinking of his next big hit.

Social Networking
Youtube channel

Free Press Media

Website

Free Press Media's Mission Statement

Twitter

Free Press Media

Physical attributes
Eye colour

Brown

Hair colour

Brown

Are there any hot blonde, b-b-babes hiding in this mosque?!

— PaulsEgo channeling the spirit of Free Press Media

Why be an atheist? Why be an atheist? Why be an atheist when there's freaking awesome faiths?

— His hit classic.

Do not be deceived, God will not be mocked. God is not a nerd. God is a cool dude.

The Apostle Paul, according to Free Press Media.
Andrew Bushard[1] (also known as The Why Be An Atheist Guy) is a young self-described liberal Christian and secret Kenyanist from the all-American state of Texas. He runs a YouTube channel under the handle of Free Press Media.

Description

His channel is all about him singing immaculately crafted acappella songs about the benefits of religion, as well as making videos about how he wants to fuck Anita Sarkeesian and Jaclyn Glenn.

On Drunken Peasants

The peasants first reviewed one of his songs on episode 55. While they claim to dislike his songs, the peasants have a secret love for his skill. They conceal their love for his riveting content because they believe that if he becomes known well enough in the public eye, he will replace Carlton Banks as the most subscribed YouTuber of all time. However, it has been claimed by many that his songs have been going downhill. Despite the inclusion of drums and a xylophone to his music, not one of the songs has been able to recreate the magic of his hit classic.

He made a second appearance in episode 57.

Free Press Media reappeared in episode 92 and amazed the peasants with his xylophone skills. He has not appeared since as he has only uploaded one new song to his YouTube channel recently. [2]

He appeared over a hundred episodes later on episode 198 asking people to donate to his Patreon campaign so he can make new music videos. We aren't fucking with you, he requested $15,000 dollars.

In episode 202, it was revealed that he has a obsession with Anita Sarkeesian, he wrote an erotic novel called "The Seduction of Anita Sarkeesian."

In episode 209, it was revealed that he has written several books, another which has to do with seducing Anita... again.

They played a video on episode 223 where he got angry about getting blocked by Megan Phelps-Roper for tweeting his Anita Sarkeesian erotic fan fiction to her. He ended up flipping her off.

He later appeared in episode 297 where he talked about his new celebrity crush, Rita Ora. The peasants dug into him harder than usual due to him trying to copyright strike an Amazing Atheist video.

He appeared in the next episode, episode 298, where he sang a song about how he is looking for a soulmate, but one who has to be the hottest babe of one of the world's religions.

Why Be An Atheist?

If you combined Justin Bieber, They Might Be Giants, and Bad Religion, you would have Andrew Bushard!

— Free Press Media describes his music.
Why Be an Atheist? (real video name No the Atheists, Yes to #Hindu #Pagan #Buddhist #Taoist) is FPM's opus. Episode 55 is named after the song.

It is sung in acappella form. The Drunken Peasants note that it is the only FPM song that has any melody.

The song was labeled Greatest Musical Work of the Modern Era by everybody (except for retards) in the world. It has been at the top of every music chart everywhere since the Big Bang.

It has become a running gag on the show ever since, known for being perhaps the most poorly sung song in Troll or Not a Troll history.

The Seduction of Anita Sarkeesian

18+: A babe named Anita Sarkeesian crusades to purify video games. But she discovers a maverick named Frelsun who is also discovering her. Frelsun thinks she is hot and stylish. Frelsun challenges Antia's world view in ways she never imagined. He entices her yet she feels conflicted. Will Frelsun succeed in his quest to seduce Anita and to transform her into a maverick?

— Description.
The Se'duction' of Anita Sarkeesian is a book written by this guy. It's an erotic novel focusing on the sexual tension between the babe Anita and a maverick named Frelsun. It's apparently a romantic comedy containing BDSM. It is written from Anita's perspective.

To use a crude pop culture phrase, feminist theory gives me an orgasm of the soul. In fact, feminist theory even gives me an orgasm of the vagina.

— Excerpt from the book, no joke

Why Be An Atheist? Lyrics

Why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist when there's freaking awesome faiths?

You could be deist

You could be Unitarian

You could be Quaker

You could be Daoist

You could be Buddhist

You could be Hindu

You could be Pagan

Why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist when there's freaking awesome faiths?

You could be something better than atheist

So why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist?

Why be an atheist when there's freaking awesome faiths?

Trivia

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  • He also has an obsession with Jaclyn Glenn, probably for the same unholy reasons as Ryan Wiley.
  • He has expressed his support for the Westboro Baptist Church[3], despite being a liberal Christian.
  • He is interested in Hot Blond Babes!
  • He has claimed that the cure for atheism is coconut butter. [4]
  • He pronounces euphoria as E-euphoria.
  • He has written a song denouncing Jonathan Edwards. [5]
  • He thinks Justin Bieber is better than Richard Dawkins as Justin has a six-pack. [6]
  • According to Ben, he is nasty in bed. How Ben came across this information is unknown.
  • He has a Bandcamp account.
  • He wants you to give him 500 dollars for some obscure reason involving Feminism.

Appearances

References

  1. https://archive.is/1Wali
  2. https://archive.is/Rf0yl
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_2ses2Gws5A
  4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZkKjJVThZU
  5. https://archive.is/o7UII
  6. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGarn42O4gg