United States

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'MERICA, FUCK YEAH
2000px-Flag of the United States.png
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Details
Leader

Emperor Donald Trump

Founder(s)

The Founding Fathers

Government

Fascist Communist Regime
Federal Presidential Constitutional Republic

Anthem

Motto

"In God we trust"

Currency

United States Dollar ($)

Population

320,000,000

Continent

North America

Demonym

American

Capital city

Washington D.C.

"
I'm becoming increasingly convinced that America is not a real country, but a satire of a country, that other countries watch to feel better about themselves.
"
TJ Kirk during his video, "Smart VS. Republican" [1]
"
You can say the founding fathers were wise but you cannot say their ideas were eternal. They were a bunch of 18th century motherfuckers.
"
— TJ Kirk, 2014
The United States of America, also known as The United States of 'Merica, is the greatest nation to ever exist in the history of man. America is home to some of the most intelligent men in the world such as Ben, Scotty, Paul and TJ. Somewhat paradoxically, America is also home to fucking retards like Brett Keane and Joseph Martelli. Major cities include: Washington D.C., New York City, Boston, Chiraq, Los Angeles, Houston, Chicago, Seattle, Phoenix, Denver, and Seattle, the latter being in competition with Amsterdam for pan smoking capital of the world. The current benevolent dictator is God-Emperor Donald Trump, a member of the Kenyanism (Republican) Party.

Now, please rise for the United States' national panthem.

History

"
Yeah, our founding fathers, Jesus and Moses.
"
— Ben during episode 85.[2]

For a long time there were no trusted accounts of the United States' history. Luckily enough, in the year 2012 acclaimed director Lance Sloane released the video "A Redneck History of America" on his satirical YouTube channel, The Amazing Atheist. During the video, the true backstory of America was told by a warm-blooded southerner who you can trust.

It was founded by, in TJ's own words "a bunch of 18th century motherfuckers", that were blessed by God to reject their hippy culture and form a better nation for all mankind. These men, later called The Founding Fathers, put their good Christian brain-power together to formulate America's original core values, including: NASCAR Racing, McDonalds, Christianity, Our 2nd Amendment Rights, and the flag. For a while, black people were owned by the white folk, but after some race traitors threw a hissy-fit, we had to give it all up for good. Now, conservative white/black folk live in the south and the liberal commies live up north. The country remains tied eternal struggle of good and evil.

Regardless, America today is an awesome place to live. Obesity and Jesus can be found everywhere due to all the cheeseburgers and churches. Illegal aliens cross the border everyday from Mexico and are shot dead. Police brutality occurs throughout the nation, but it is actually not a big problem at all because it's totally justified. Sadly, liberal commies are taking control of America and pushing the gay agenda to children. They also want to take our guns away so that we can't fight back against the impending White-Christian genocide.

The History of America

On Drunken Peasants

Being that Drunken Peasants is a group of four liberal commies residing in the United States, it's not surprising that the country is a frequent topic on the podcast. The peasants often talk about politics relating to America on their show, especially during the DP Action News. The peasants talk shit on America and it's backwards-ass laws all the time, but they at least admit that it isn't as bad as living with our cunty neighbors to the north. Prominent political punching bags include; Donald Trump, Alex Jones, Hillary Clinton, and Tucker Carlson.

On Amazing Atheist

GeorgeKeaneHollywood.jpg

Politics in America are a core part of TJ's main channel, one could argue almost as much as atheism. TJ has expressed very strong feelings about the country and has been highly vocal of his political opinions since the very start. A fuckton of TJ's videos also have "America" in the title. As of July 2016, that number is over forty videos. TJ's political videos have also garnered him some fans who are interested in him for reasons other than atheist content.

Cities in Merica'

  • Columbus, the shithole the Peasants used to stream from.
  • Seattle, the Peasants' new weed heaven, haven, and the show's new broadcasting location
  • Albuquerque, which must be the home of Ben's commie indoctrination
  • New York City, Capitalist City
  • Denver, A place with weed
  • San Antonio, PaulsEgo's former roaming grounds
  • Washington D.P.
  • Hollywood, Brett Keane's rightful city
  • Pandeville, Scammer Breeding Grounds
  • Festus, Home of the landlocked Manatee
  • Detroit, which should be annihilated with Michigan

Trivia

  • As of 2016, 4 states and the nation's capital cube have legalized pan.
  • Every Christian in each state and district was instantly executed by homosexuals when the legislation was passed.
  • The only shitty thing about America is Barack Obama...and all niggers in general. Just ask Tommy Sotomayor.
  • Many people say that Jesus was the first American.
  • America is under the control of the Illuminati.

Image Gallery

Gallery of American Presidents

History Videos About America

How We Won The American Revolution


References

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Zjh4bxFpE0
  2. https://youtu.be/MWXrOiMdXCk?t=1h21m46s